5 Principles Every Couple Needs to Know
Are you looking for solid marriage advice from a Biblical perspective? This article explains the 5 most common problems that plague marriages.
There is lot’s of marriage advice out there – advice that will never touch on some very important core issues. Without understanding these 5 core issues to all marriage problems you will be at a grave disadvantage. Couples of faith understand that they need Biblically sound marriage principles, not just run of the mill marriage advice if they are to fight marriage enemy #1.
Sadly, 50% of couples are divorcing. Add to that number those who are separating and not reconciling and the number soars to 66%. Additionally, research shows only 25% of couples are truly happy. With numbers like these, We can’t deny that couples are in a serious battle for their marriages.
Some research shows that people of faith are also experiencing severe marital problems. This tells us some thing is terribly wrong. Would you agree? I mean, it just doesn’t make sense that people who have faith in God would be experiencing the same patterns of divorce and other marriage problems as those with no faith in the Almighty.
Though this article is not intended to explore the various reasons that might explain this pattern, we can’t ignore this condundrum. Therefore, the first piece of marriage advice I can give you is this: If you and your spouse are on a destructive marriage path then the most important thing to do is to take inventory of your relationship with God. The Shema in Deuteronomy 6:5 says, “Love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might.”
Beyond, testing yourself to see if you are in the faith, making sure that loving and serving God are your highest priorities there are 5 core Biblically based marriage advice principles that are important to grasp.
Understanding and applying these principles can help you have a great marriage that satisfies you and glorifies God.
1. Your struggle is primarily against your own flesh.
Okay, you’ve read it. Now I want you to say it, out loud. Yes, right now, say it. Come on, this is important!
“My struggle in my marriage is really with myself.”
Now, I’ll explain this in more detail, but it is critical that you remember this principle. And remind yourself often (say it out loud!) This principle is so important because…
It is so easy to start seeing your spouse as the enemy. We start fighting against each other instead of keeping our eyes fixed on our Redeemer God.
Like little lost sheep we tend to lose our focus very quickly. Again, this isn’t just marriage advice, this is truth that we must learn to live by.
“Okay” you say, “so if our battle is not against flesh and blood, what or who is it against?
2. You must recognize your own evil inclinations.
The second marriage advice principle comes from Genesis 3:6 which states “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate…” Despite the fact the God was very clear about the matter of not eating the fruit, Eve wanted her own way…she wanted to satisfy the lusts of her own flesh. She was not thinking about how to please and honor God or her husband.
What kind of conflict do you think erupted after Eve and Adam ate the fruit and were banned by God from the garden? Can you imagine some of the choice words they might have had with each other?
Sound familiar? The point is this — caving to the lusts of the flesh destroys marriages by causing conflict. That combined with our own selfish natures (we prefer to blame rather than take responsibility) results in many marriage battles.
Just remember, marriage problems are a consequence of the fall. So my marriage advice to you is remember that you are in a battle and that your own evil inclinations are often the the thing that arouses conflict in your marriage. There are 3 more Biblical Marriage Advice principles that couples should understand.